soo. i hate myself for relapsing, i was finally able to go days without even thinking about drugs. the thought didn’t even cross my mind, i blame myself for having no self control. but i realize, its not all my fault. it’s my shitty friends who can’t take into consideration that i can’t do this anymore, that my boyfriend’s in rehab so clearly i’m trying to get sober too. even when i try to remove myself from the situation with the ONE friend i would think would fucking help me out and leave with me. it’s not fair, i know i shouldn’t blame it on anyone. but i’m fucking sick of pondering in my head whether i want to pick up or not. i want it sooo fucking bad but i know i don’t need it and it wouldn’t benefit me.
ugh fuck it, don’t do drugs kidz